My heart leaps up when I behold

As an adult born with heart defects, I can't begin to explain the boundless joy of hearing our baby's heart beating for the first time. I am beyond elated to hear that my child's heart is beating normally. In fact, until I am able to come up with the adequate words, if this will ever happen, it's probably just best to hear my reaction.

Thanks be to God.

Hadiya Pentleton Made a Video

"Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage." Those are lyrics penned by Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins. It's kind of how I felt yesterday after reading about the killing of Hadiya Pentleton. Then the Trib posted an anti-gang video she and some of her friends made. 

When I see this, it's hard not to feel sickened by the irony. Or even wonder if this somehow played a role in her death. I don't think that's likely. She and her friends saw what was happening around them and made a video. They did something. 

While I don't believe I am a rat in a cage, I often feel that way, especially as a rather sheltered, white, middle-class man. I was relating this sense of helplessness to my wife. I really have no idea what to do other than pray. I don't want to say "just" pray. I hear people say, well, there is not much you can do other than "just pray." This diminishes the efficacy of prayer, as well as the power of God. I will pray. But yet, I want to do more. I told my wife I was thinking about fasting until the violence stops. I believe there is power in prayer, but there is amazing power in fasting and prayer, especially when you think of hunger fasts from the past that were geared towards social injustice. 

But with my personality (I love attention) I felt like all this would do would draw attention to myself. However, I acknowledge much good has come from people using the Internet to share their stories, someone else's story and/or give much needed attention to a cause.

So far, the most original thought I have had was to shock everyone. To unnerve everyone out there. Consistently. The Internet is chock full of shock videos, pictures, etc. We are practically numb to them at times. I've seen some of them, and I've always been more intrigued with the videos that show how people respond to these videos. Their facial expressions and their physiological response. As someone who has seen a few of these pictures, I can tell you, the mere mention of a name calls forth that image very quickly.

I don't want to do this to make people sick or fearful, but I want to do it so they don't compartmentalize the death of a young child into that part of our brain where we store statistics and unrelateable information. If we learned anything from the mass shooting at Connecticut, and all the others for that matter, they shock and terrify us and our sense of security. We don't feel as safe anymore. Not at work. Not at school. Not our place of worship. We become desperate to find some means of safety and protection for our children and loved ones. But in truth, this is how some people live all the time. It just doesn't make headline news. 

It's only January, and Chicago has already had 42 homicides. This matched a record last set in 2002. And this is after a year of over 500 murders. 

So, dear readers, please pray. Pray I would know how to rattle cages.

 

Enough!

I just don't know what to say anymore. I feel like I finally understand why angry prophets ripped their clothes and wore sackcloth and ashes. Not that I'm a prophet, but I feel that angry and saddened by the continued violence in Chicago.

Headline from Chicago Tribute website: Boy, 10: 'It's very painful to see your big sister get slaughtered'

Her name was Hadiya Pendleton and she was killed while taking refuge during a storm. She had just returned from performing with her band in Obama's inauguration. Last year they played in Mardi Gras. This year they had plans to go to Dublin and Paris.

Some things said about her by family and friends:

She wanted to be a pharmacist or journalist.
She was one of those people everyone loved.
She loved Coldplay and Maroon 5.
She had two left feet.
She will be missed.

Please pray.

Spoiler Alert!

Are people more upset about spoiler alerts today than they used to be? Or do we just hear more people whining and moaning about spoiler alerts? Recently some event happened in the very popular British import, Downton Abbey. For awhile I was chuckling at all the reactions of people on Facebook. Most of them were managing to express their anger and shock without mentioning names or exact events. 

And then I was noticing some people reacting strongly to others, presumably on Facebook, that had spoiled the actual events for them. And these people were ticked. Once again, I chuckled a bit at them and scoffed. These are clearly first world problems, and we seriously need to get some perspective on things. 

And then it happened to me. Today. It was so sudden. So quick. So fast. Like a tiny ninja sneaking up behind me and slitting my throat. I barely had time to process what happened. I was scrolling through my feed over lunch break, and then I saw four simple words, "Oh no, not name!" I was stunned. Sputtering. Shaking my head. 

That's all it took. Four words. I tried to keep my cool, but I did respond in this person's comments saying the person should get an award for the best or worst spoiler alert ever. And now I know who not to get too attached to as I soon will be starting the second season. The friend responded that I (meaning me) don't know what exactly happened. True. But I am pretty sure that the recent words used such as "tragic," "shocking," etc, indicate that this character didn't simply fall in the mud while dismounting a horse.

I think this is all just more collateral damage of media saturated culture. We have all these avenues of watching shows at our leisure - DVR, streaming, downloading to your hard drives, etc. And we also have a social media that has almost become extensions of our brains, so we can immediately express our reactions to events. We no more think a thought than we then put it on Facebook. We are shocked by a turn of events in a show, and we all do this collectively shared gasp on Facebook or Twitter. It's almost as if the tail is wagging the dog now.  We don't know how to experience something without convulsively and immediately vomiting it up for everyone to see.

Yeah, I said vomit. I think the distance between our brains and Facebook is becoming as short as our mouth and the puke bucket. I'm not entirely above this. When my wife says something funny, I immediately want to share it with everyone, and sometimes I do. I suppose that's not a bad thing, but what would I have done before Facebook or Twitter or...uh....Google Plus (Bahahaha, bless Google Plus's heart )?

What would I have done without Facebook or Twitter? Cherished the moment? Wrote about it in a journal? I really can't remember anymore. I think social media has effectively rewired the way I think. And that really frightens me.

Okay, this post started off talking about spoiler alerts and has hopped, skipped and jumped into the perils of social media.  

What I really wanted to say is so what? So what if we know that Luke Skywalker's dad is Darth Vader? So what if we know she's really a man? So what if we know who Keyser Soze?  

I contend if the story is good enough, the characters are well developed, and the dialogue is rich, those spoilers will not diminish the enjoyment of a good movie or TV show. In fact, sometimes those twist endings or big reveals often overshadow the greatness of a good movie. And in some cases, no matter how amazing the twist at the end is, your movie or TV show could still suck. Yes, I'm talking to you M. Night Shyamalan, specifically in regards to The Village and to a lesser extent, Signs. 

Oh, and: Spoiler Alert! You will die at the end. Make sure your life is more than a sad ending.

New Sensation

I had a new sensation this morning while waiting on the train. I felt my left eyebrow freeze. Well, I'm pretty sure that's what it is. I should say that I've also felt my nose hairs freeze. Apparently not everyone has experienced this sensation. If you've played with tiny magnets and felt them pull each other. It kinda feels like that, except in your nose. It kinda tickles too.  I must admit I kinda liked it.

The eyebrow thing is new, though. It felt like there was cake icing in eyebrow. I always figured my eyebrows were pretty dry, but I wonder if some residual shower water was trapped in my eyebrow hairs. At any rate, it was a new sensation.

And I kinda liked it.