This may be a short post. My wife, Heather, is in bed. We celebrated our anniversary tonight. I grilled a steak, made mashed (red) potatoes and some asparagus. And we drank some port. We actually sat at the dinner table, which is not common for most of our meals. We talked about our first year together. Really, we did. I know it sounds like something they would do in a TV show or movie, but we really did reminisce over our first year. Our first date. Our second date. Our third date. Our first impressions. And so on.
While talking to Heather about my impressions of her I noticed how she has become more amazing and beautiful to me since even the day before our marriage. I knew I connected with her on an intimate level. I knew I felt like I could be me, but I had no idea how awesome she really was until after being married to her. Is that wrong to say that? I don't know.
I told her it was kinda like holding one of those loops in a jewelry shop up to one spot on an a beautiful painting, like a Monet, Van Gogh, or a Pollock (I had to throw in a modern). The part that I saw under that magnifying lens was great, but I knew there was so much more. And yeah, sure, when you look with a loop, when you look close enough, you expect to see a flaw. But I have spent some time researching diamonds, and if there is one thing I've learned, it's that every diamond should have a flaw. If the diamond doesn't have a flaw, it's probably not a diamond. And I could never trust a person who didn't have flaws.
But I digress. It wasn't her small, barely noticeable (in case you're reading this, honey, I love you!) flaws that drew me in. It was the fact that I knew that this person was an amazing, well-crafted work of art. No, that's not right, not a work of art. A finished piece of art is somewhat static. Sure, I can revisit it at different times in my life and have a different response, but it remains stuck in time.
But here's the thing, Heather and I create this new thing together. By getting married, we really became different people. In a lot of ways, we became one person, but not in the way we think of personhood. I am thinking of the way personhood is represented in the Trinity. It's this ongoing relationship between all persons of the Trinity. Similarly, Heather doesn't complete me, but she compliments me, we enhance each other. She adds to my life. I just know my wife and I love doing life together. We are still these separate identifies, but we are also one person. I don't understand how that works, but I know that when I leave the house to run an errand, and she stays at home, I miss her. I think of her. If I'm in Walgreen's, and I see a bag of Twizzlers, I usually pick them up for her. And she does the same thing for me in so many ways, but not really with Twizzlers.
I don't know if I circled back around to the point I was trying to make about the mystery and beauty of our first year, but I'm tired. It's late. I want to watch something on Netflix and go to bed. One last thing, as a person who was single for a very long time, I do feel the need to give a PSA on how marriage will not totally fulfill you, etc, but honestly, most of you are tired of hearing that. I was tired of hearing that.
Some people look at art and say, I may not know good art, but I know what I like. Well, I say you should probably take an art history class because that would really help you make an informed decision.
And I love my wife.
